Colleen Trolove & Miraka Shelly Davies Writing Training

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How to communicate with customers: Put on their smelly shoes (Part 2)

Ok, so last week we talked about increasing empathy and I dropped the super fun bombshell that empathy requires vulnerability.

BUT WHY IS EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT VULNERABILITY??

(Yes, I’m shouting.)

If you haven’t heard of Brené Brown you must live under a rock, or you clearly haven’t been paying any attention to me for the past however long you’ve known me. She is a researcher and storyteller and is quantifying and qualifying so much of what we know about emotions and leadership and pretty much everything I believe in.

Here’s what her research has helped us understand:

Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.
Brené Brown.

Look, I think learning to make vulnerability a superpower is a lifelong mission. It is for me. So you’re not going to just flick a switch. Watch some TED talks. Do some reading. Go to therapy. I dunno, do what works for you.

But all I can tell you is that as I’ve nurtured my ability to be vulnerable, everything has gotten better. YES, EVERYTHING.

And, having said that, I’m NOT at all suggesting you go to work and just start oversharing your personal life with everyone around you – especially not with your customers! That’s actually super not ok.

So, let’s talk about what vulnerability can look like at work.

How to be appropriately vulnerable at work

In a nutshell, we can think about vulnerability at work in 2 basic ways: personal vulnerability, and organisational vulnerability. Without clarity between the two, the whole concept just gets a bit messy. So here’s what I mean:

Personal vulnerability

This is about the way you show up, communicate, interact, and engage with co-workers (including managers/uplines). Being able to show more parts of you to the people you work with can help build closer, more trusting relationships. This is about being more connected in your workplace.

Organisational vulnerability

This is about how your place of work – whether that’s a company or a non-profit or a government department – interacts with the world around it. How does your organisation talk to customers, community, stakeholders, peers, competitors? How does it position itself in terms of those relationships?

Both personal and organisational vulnerability have a place in customer service

This is because when you’re communicating with customers, you’re both a person and a representative of the organisation.

So *some* of being appropriately vulnerable in our customer service roles is about creating that personal connection with another human through shared experience. Like when you ask someone how they are and they tell you the storm kept them awake last night, and you say, “oh, me too! Did it do much damage around your place?”

See? Connection. Just like that. You’re now 2 humans connecting over shared experience.

Connection: I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship. - Brené Brown

Organisational vulnerability, on the other hand, looks like this:

Imagine this scenario

A customer is pissed because your service broke. They’re grumpy and maybe even a bit rude. It’s been fucking inconvenient for them. They know it, and you know it.

Reply option 1: Thanks for your email. We apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Why do you reply this way? Because you’ve been told it’s professional and polite. Because you’re not being YOU, you’re being the voice of the organisation.

Reply option 2: Oh no, that doesn’t sound good at all. Sorry that happened. Let’s see how we can make things right.

This is organisational vulnerability in action. It says, “Hey human, we’re human too. We’re not even going to pretend this *may* have been inconvenient. It was. We’re imperfect, and we know it.”

An organisation builds connection with customers through vulnerability

If we think about it, “professionalism” is the armour organisations wear to differentiate themselves from the mere humans. The armour pretends an organisation is made of bricks and mortar. That they hold themselves to some higher standard.

That may have worked in the past but it rarely does today.

When your company’s voice (and your customer service communications) become more human, customers feel more connected. They feel more heard. They feel more LOYAL.
And I know you want that.

OK, so we’ve talked about empathy and vulnerability.

How excited are we to talk about authenticity next week in part 3?

(I can hear some of you groaning from here. Love you!)